tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58745022012-01-16T20:56:10.026ZMostly he cooks, occasionally he remembers to writeMatthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comBlogger3751100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-47370625483222504262012-01-16T20:29:00.002Z2012-01-16T20:56:10.036Z

and why not? the tea is bubbling away, Mrs Coastalblog is swearing at her planning, the offspring sleeping the sweet, inscrutable sleep of the indestructible and I have a moment, just a moment, to spare, so why not list five things currently getting on my nerves? After all, it's so fresh! Okay, fine, I'm bored.1) Gove, obviously2) Oh, Michael Kiwanuke, you come across in interviews as a

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-46222601370488698552012-01-10T22:36:00.003Z2012-01-10T23:03:58.244Z

Oh dear oh doctor I really am not terribly good at the internet, as you have probably gathered by now. Or rather, I lack the inclination to be so. So here we are in 2012, when people have phones that can remodel their faces to attune to their mood, where children can create music from air, where even my ten month old son is using his iPad to start a record label to rep the ten month old scene,

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-62337062353470345882012-01-04T20:32:00.002Z2012-01-04T20:39:35.636Z

New, new, new, all is new and shiny in the limping, wheezing world of coastalblog. Well, not overly so, but I can now do these !@? I feel so much mre expressive. And yes, I'm aware that I could have used a virtual keyboard, but frankly I couldn't be arsed. The main problem is re-teaching myself to type, I've gotten so used to caps-locking on and off at lightning speed, as well as avoiding most

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-81981646923300204352011-12-27T00:22:00.002Z2011-12-27T00:32:10.413Z

I think, pretty sure it happened, hands have slightly more cuts and burns than usual so it seems like that Decemeber's occurred all over me, nice.What, I don't say hi for months and then it's some mumbling nonsense about December, I look back to more cogent and lucid dissections of the hell of christmas from a catering perspective and weep bitter, bitter tears. Well, I'm saying hi

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-59264987601387056232011-08-04T23:23:00.002+01:002011-08-04T23:34:40.943+01:00

goosed, just..goosedi'm still devoid of shift keys, hence the raworth-esque feel of the post, and this minor problem is still enough to keep me away from the keyboardwhich is a shame, for there are many interesting things occurring, be they coastalblog's crust-earning enterprise source [again, lack of shift precludes html, google it, completism-fans] kicking up a quality food ruckus at

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-30267487868812362052011-06-20T00:25:00.002+01:002011-06-20T00:31:20.453+01:00

Hello, a brief check in to direct those who may be interested in the general direction of a couple of ongoing bits and bobs by associates of coastalblog, should you be a of a creative bent you may find them handyhttp://www.nicolereneepantano.com/#!portfolio-2http://holdfirepress.wordpress.com/there we go, dissemination gives one a warm glow, does it not. more considered and lengthier posts to

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-44085497414004288142011-05-09T00:45:00.002+01:002011-05-09T01:04:53.362+01:00

I mean seriously, that is getting on for half a year. All reason dictates that clearly I have a bit too much going on to keep going with dear old wheezing Coastalblog, with its bouncy 1.0 look and utter disregard for any development in web-based technology of the last, ohh seven years.Probably should knock it on the head, to be honest. I barely have time for a facebook status update, let alone an

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-83334215210528966452011-01-11T17:51:00.002Z2011-01-11T18:03:04.322Z

I've just finished reading Peter Ackroyd's Hawksmoor (a mere 17 years after starting it, giving up and bunging it on a shelf, 16 year old me clearly had less patience); it was, as Ackroyd nearly always is, dense, verging on the mystical and practically damp with the Thames' winter mist rising from the page.I mention it purely because as I was reading it, as so often seems to happen, one of the

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-51592309229129060202011-01-02T21:34:00.003Z2011-01-02T21:43:16.254Z

In these days of austerity and pulling through together, it is beholden upon us to audit ourselves at every moment, to see if there's any more WE could be doing for the cause. So, depite it being only Jan 2nd here are my achievements so far:I have snarled at a cash-machine on the off chance that it attempts to guilt trip me into gving to charity.I have learned how a thermocouple works, and am a

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-59928599626836321992011-01-01T21:11:00.002Z2011-01-01T21:18:40.985Z

In much the same way as it's cliched to be cynical about Chrstmas, it is something of a bore to be snarky about new years resolutions. That said, it is to my mind a trifle dull to be banging on about new year at all, so hoist by my own petard really. Heigh ho.Temporally speaking I suppose it makes sense to use Jan 1 to demarcate your past self from your present, and by extension future selves.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-2440333622449482362010-12-29T22:23:00.002Z2010-12-29T22:25:51.961Z

Poems to be found in the estimable Ekleksographia magazine here. To my mild shock I appear to be rubbing electronic shoulders with Harry Mathews, something of a god of mine. May need a lie down.May need one anyway. Dec, so untenably busy. Normal service resumes shortly. Merry and Happy etc etc, as you were.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-55520911529653401312010-12-13T22:51:00.002Z2010-12-13T23:14:27.519Z

December in full swing. Pans, knives etc. Will be more coherent in new year promise.Though whilst I am here I will point out this: the incumbent government made a big hoohah upon arrival of their bonfire of the quangos because they are "unelected and not answerable".Today Eric Pickles pushes through his localism bill, devolving power to local citizens. Who are also, I cannot help but note,

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-14061907146608146302010-11-30T08:06:00.002Z2010-11-30T08:18:42.110Z

I confess to being a little mystified by the US reaction to the current crop of wikileaks documents. Much froth and splutter about their unacceptability, dottle and bile about lives at risk and what have you. It makes me wonder if they've actually stopped to think about what's come to light.The big ones that the british media are running with, for example, do in fact rather help the US. Don't

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-40859949127700573022010-11-24T21:48:00.002Z2010-11-24T21:55:09.147Z

Two which have occupied me today: How much tax has Bono avoided paying in Ireland, what with his being domiciled abroad for income tax reasons? likewise the rest of bleeding U2. Just curious, is all. Seems a bit rich banging on about third world debt when your own country is bleeding to death due to the tax avoidance of rich arseholes, like, say, self-regarding rock-goblins.Why on Earth did Gove

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-18118376660094793602010-11-16T21:44:00.002Z2010-11-16T21:59:11.880Z

Now, contrary to what you may have gleaned from the reams of vituperation which have spooled forth upon these pages since coastalblog's inception I do not, as a general rule, quiver with contempt for my fellow man en bloc. Well, maybe a touch, but on the whole I try to see the best.but around about this time every year a phenomenon occurs which causes your correspondent to desire to gnaw his own

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-51174824193420308932010-11-08T22:44:00.002Z2010-11-08T23:02:31.316Z

Now. I have maintained that twitter is where I draw the line, and the reason I have consistently given is that I recoil at the ego rampant. It mystifies me that anyone would imagine their every waking moment should be documented for the edification of others, and, to be fair to me, it still does. Sure I blog a bit, but mostly for my own amusement, and at a frequency so intermittent that it's

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-86489338017557719002010-11-01T23:01:00.002Z2010-11-01T23:14:45.393Z

Less than coherent. Brief points to be going on with.1) Good to see Prof Nutt pointing out yet again that booze is nastier than pills. Pillheads slap head, say duh (some miss, undermining their point). Worth, however, pointing out that booze tastes nicer. Possibly crucial in final analysis.2) The trip. Awfully good. Notable for chefs country-wide cracking up when Coogan orders soup followed by

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-4765568848273390862010-10-21T22:00:00.002+01:002010-10-21T22:04:26.058+01:00

So you sit in a church, some people say some things, and you feel you are observing all proprieties, then you crumble, then you weep.That's grief, then, like a good anglo-saxon male, you box it up and get on.Then, weeks later, a passing thought brings you to your knees.I suspect this may take a while.I further suspect that I'm a fucking idiot for thinking it might not.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-1438859521490585872010-10-18T22:13:00.003+01:002010-10-18T22:16:47.692+01:00

It comes as a mild surprise to note that today is the third anniversary of the death of the wonderul Alan Coren. That's a quick three years. I was thinking of him just the other day, as it happens, watching the cleggster and cabletron's astonishing voltes-faces on tuition fees (+everything else they once held very firm, unshakeable beliefs about) one of the first things that popped into my head

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-9474774566222292092010-10-17T23:04:00.003+01:002010-10-17T23:25:48.861+01:00

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.Talk about conflict? Believe me. You know who I don't want to be? I don't want to be an indie snark purist. You know the ones, the ones who drop a band like a hot potato the moment they get a sniff of success; the ones who when you cheerily mention how much you like a track off a band's third album, say, will sniff at you and state that the only good track they ever did

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-21807089018057508132010-10-16T00:35:00.002+01:002010-10-16T00:53:03.964+01:00

Bah, possibly also humbug.Contrary to the childish posturing of the posts below I am not constantly at odds with existence for no reason other than to be a reactionary bastard. I mean, I am, a bit, but not overly proud of it, kind of teenage really. You'd think I'd have grown out of that sort of entry-level bile by now, but sadly not, it's a cross we'll just all have to bear.That said, I was

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-15882952860061679412010-10-12T15:35:00.003+01:002010-10-12T16:04:43.402+01:00

Now I admit that I am prone to the odd generalisation, occasionally even a touch of hyperbole (no, no, don't argue, I admit it). But a stroll into town with the boy last weekend provided me with troubling, worrying evidence that some generalisations are, well, right.our route took us past the rugby club (ho ho, you cry, he's about to have a pop at rugby, favoured past-time of boorish chaps called

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-11037253712663444662010-10-11T22:14:00.003+01:002010-10-11T22:29:52.794+01:00

I inhabit an appalling duality, seriously. Some days it's nigh on impossible to get out of bed. You see, there are two of me. I know, I know, we're all multi-faceted, each of us is terribly complex etc etc. I am not, however, there are, simply put, two of me.As a general rule of thumb I'm relatively liberal, reasonably relaxed and inclined to see the best in people. However I am, also, a chef.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-11877602786541195002010-10-01T00:21:00.002+01:002010-10-01T00:29:10.290+01:00

The better memoried among you may recall me be describing the labour leadership contest as yadda yadda yadda David Miliband wins. I got that wrong. But in fairness, so did everybody else, and people pay money for their stuff. So who's the biggest idiot, eh?And yes, I'm aware that the leadership election occurred the best part of a week ago, but frankly, it takes me a while to get round to these

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-60748081922451878152010-09-29T22:34:00.003+01:002010-09-29T22:46:40.613+01:00

For reviving me from the slough of meh I have been wandering aimlessly through of late, a smallish sign of life, but a significant one nonetheless.Why yes, dear reader, I was yelling at the telly! And the object of my ire? Well, an advert, obv. It was for some sort of yoghurt. The basic premise was two pretty-ish middle class sorts enjoying their yoghurts on a balcony, as that's what pretty-ish

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-54549166905401597142010-09-16T21:28:00.003+01:002010-09-16T21:42:41.647+01:00

First up thanks to all for kind thoughts, words and deeds. It's all much appreciated (though those words do the degree of a appreciation a gross injustice). It's impossible, I feel, to adequately convey a reaction or emotion under this sort of circumstance. One of the reasons I chose not to speak at the funeral is that every sentiment sounds like a Hallmark card, it sticks in my throat, it

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-74468281539632217692010-09-09T23:15:00.002+01:002010-09-09T23:38:25.987+01:00

HiI am in two minds about this post, well, three, possibly four. A couple of years ago I'd have dived (dove?) right in but now...um...I have, as I have alluded to below, become uncomfortable with getting into stuff on the internet to any great extent. There're manifold reasons for this unease; I am primarily a paper and pen man when all's said and done, simply as there's clearly more effort

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-43267098180515191362010-08-15T23:10:00.003+01:002010-08-15T23:17:22.516+01:00

Down to the dear old SW for a few days watching a small boy chase chickens and pick broad beans. Bliss. Though the paterfamilias has been muttering darkly about me doing a spot of roofing to earn my keep. Your humble correspondent hasn't been a roofer for about ten years, but as the only family member still capable of climbing a ladder I suppose it falls to me. Will I come back collar bone intact

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-90281948218463329062010-08-12T23:20:00.002+01:002010-08-13T00:00:13.230+01:00

Now, as many of you will be aware, your humble correspondent earns his corn in part by knocking out fodder. I chef, in other words. I'm reliably informed that I'm reasonable enough at it; I'd like to think so, I try to take a bit of pride in what I do, anyhow. I think it's pretty good, and I have a small core of very happy, very regular, customers.Note the small part.Now, I owe a lot to ormskirk.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-54376951590909201012010-08-02T22:19:00.002+01:002010-08-02T22:35:19.552+01:00

Otherwise bored, so, Richard Ashcroft. Richard fucking Ashcroft. The Ashley Cole of dreary lumpen dad rock. Patron Saint of people who find Paul Weller slightly too edgy. The man who gives messiah complexes a bad name. Heard any of the new stuff? No? You lucky fucker. It makes Oasis sound like Sufjan Stevens, Shed Seven sound like Phillip Glass; or someone having a painful shit, you know, one of

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-68287539891845341772010-07-20T18:53:00.003+01:002010-07-20T19:12:36.048+01:00

Good cause time, people.The consistently interesting publisher Salt (full disclosure: home of one or two friends of Coalstalblog) is currently up against it money wise and as such has launched the Just one book appeal. Well, appeal's the wrong word, but you take my point. I apreciate that in this terribly exciting modern world in which we live in (to paraphrase McCartney) nobody does anything so

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-43450881383629845312010-07-12T21:37:00.003+01:002010-07-12T21:49:29.865+01:00

Ah teh internets. Home of more pictures of fluffy kittens than one could shake an email inviting me to "make your manhood amaze" at. Repository of news, opinion and information. And also a home for self indulgent whiners to bang on about how nobody understands them omg, or possibly share a few details which they may, in time, come to regret.I've always held an uneasy line on this. Mrs Coastalblog

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-15592633548081958192010-07-03T00:43:00.002+01:002010-07-03T00:51:38.001+01:00

Breaking news from our stating the bleeding obvious desk. A ruck between a python and an alligator in florida ended in a score draw when the python, adopting a tactic not entirely unfamiliar to followers of Ricky Hatton's career, ate his oppo whole. A clean win for the python you may think, but wrong, in the sort of stirring fightback entirely alien to fans of most of England's national sides the

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-42098984651476066402010-06-27T01:14:00.005+01:002010-06-27T01:40:41.166+01:00

It's hard work maintaining an interest in England Football (caps intentional). Please don't get me wrong, from the first world cup I can recall (Mexico 86) through the horrors of the 88 european championship, the zeitgeist shifting italia 90, the less said the better euro 92, the abortion of a qualifying campaign for USA 94, the worrying jingoism of euro 96, the drewery years, the keegan years (

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-82221768056870002942010-06-26T23:45:00.000+01:002010-06-26T23:46:17.276+01:00

Daily Mail readers rubbish in bed proven by science

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-86219998298649734102010-06-21T19:39:00.002+01:002010-06-21T19:58:55.715+01:00

Now it is of zero interest to me personally if Chris Huhne decides he wants to trade hid wife in for a younger model. Sunrise, sunset. However, his peremptorily bald twitter announcement did pique my interest slightly; for those unaware it read, simply: "I am in a serious relationship with Carina Trimingham and I am separating from my wife."Bully for you Chris. However it strikes me that it would

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-71170764534159506982010-06-13T22:06:00.002+01:002010-06-13T22:09:41.851+01:00

So anyhow, just in case the news had slipped your attention, as it turns out the two young men whose untimely deaths sparked the whole oh no surely the mephedrone will kill us all farrago's autopsy reports came in last week (meant to post before, too busy etc). No mephedrone in their systems. At all. Not a tiny drug-shaped sausage. Mystifyingly this wasn't widely reported. Cannot for the life of

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-1999609427494600732010-05-20T01:51:00.002+01:002010-05-20T02:01:20.968+01:00

Twice in one night! I Know! But I'm SO excited about eh labour party leadership contest I couldn't wait! To recap:1) Middle class white bloke, awesome, strong candidate, who believes we need to talk to the grassroots2) Middle class white bloke's middle class, white brother, who is different, yeah? Strongly believes we need to talk to the grass roots3) Middle class white bloke, marginally less

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-18840242828591342832010-05-20T00:50:00.002+01:002010-05-20T01:21:33.780+01:00

I have been, as is my wont, a trifle busy. Do not weep for me my children, for this is a good thing. When you own your own business, for reasons which become increasingly obscure, busy is good. I'm often amused by people coming in very early/late in an apologetic manner: "I'm sorry to bother you" they whisper, ashen-faced "No! Bother me!" I cry "Because bothering me will involve money! Which I

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-23842456581116598642010-05-06T20:33:00.002+01:002010-05-06T20:49:24.311+01:00

Unfairly labelled as the weak track on OK Computer, I rather liked it.So I have refrained from commenting on the hullabaloo for the duration of the campaign, partially because I couldn't be arsed but mostly because, please, a blogger? Commenting about the election? Kind of declasse, non? But now that the jig is finally up I can breathe out and start with the usual flotsam again.Some final

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-45812903656131043102010-04-27T23:43:00.002+01:002010-04-27T23:47:13.878+01:00

Please do not use these in my hearing, I have but one life to live, and I'd prefer not to spend it drowning you forcibly."Game Changer""Game Face""Cleggstacy""Broken Britain""Big Society""The Old Parties" (from the leader of the Whigs, as far as I can gather)"Tactical voting" (or, "voting" as it used to be called)doubtless more to follow, as the whole sorry farrago reaches its dreary apotheosis.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-50854046243301354302010-04-17T23:55:00.002+01:002010-04-18T00:04:13.729+01:00

Hello!Been quiet round here of late for work-related, and then holiday related, reasons. Of these I shall divulge little. Suffice to say, should you find yourself in the staffordshire village of Cotton, bugger off for a bite to eat at the Star Inn sharpish, and you will be a happy person. Conversely, should you find yourself in the otherwise blameless town of Leek, avoid the Foxlowe at all costs.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-71794935909084686562010-03-29T20:33:00.003+01:002010-03-29T20:54:14.711+01:00

Hysterical (in at least two senses of the word) report on C4 news this evening. The (apparent)rise of mephedrone (which will surely Kill Us All) was tackled with all the head nodding, chin stroking gravitas of a Very Serious Subject. M-Cat, or meow-meow, as absolutely nobody calls it, is killing our kids at a rate of knots. And is now to be banned so fast its little feet, made of drugs, won't

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-30329579711521602122010-03-26T22:44:00.002Z2010-03-26T23:20:53.220Z

In all honesty i have very little of intersst to say, very little of interest has occurred, or ,if it has, I'v been too knackered to notice. So, in the absence of anything interesting to say, have a list of things. Originally this paragraph concluded "which, given that the universe is slowing, are, in the grand scheme of things of very little consequence indeed". As the post went on and I got

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-64785437664767991462010-03-18T22:05:00.002Z2010-03-18T22:23:38.013Z

Now, I'm as fond of a drink as the next man, unless the next man happens to be (insert recent drunk celebrity here for instant smug yucks) but I'm starting to get a little uneasy about the up and up of the booze-tastic trade in dear ol' ormy of late.Please do not misunderstand me, part of my living comes from the sale of alcohol, though I very much doubt that any criticism of the binge-drinking

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-7543561408519007492010-03-17T22:32:00.002Z2010-03-17T22:37:22.047Z

In no sense as long a post as the one crowning Asley Cole world's least self aware person, but, to be fair this is more a of a niche category. And just a little too involved to be a facebook status update. what's the award? You rightly cry. Well, it's not so much an award as an attempt to spread the misery, so, without further ado the prize for this week's most pretentious, self-aggrandising

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-8375897949542016242010-03-08T21:38:00.002Z2010-03-08T21:42:31.673Z

A quick perusal of the logs informs me that your super soaraway coastalblog is #4 on google for " john terry ashley cole vernon kay scum". Well, strictly speaking the searcher was looking for scun, rather than scum, but kindly google in its infinite wisdom chose to interpret the search as scum, thus sparing awkward moments all round. Well done chaps, good luck with the global domination, I've a

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-84563174157381029572010-03-04T19:52:00.002Z2010-03-04T20:05:00.046Z

Breaking news from our stating the bleeding obvious desk. A spokesman for Sanguine Hospitality, owners of the Swan has reiterated that any hotel accomodation would not be in any way a budget hotel, what with it being attached to a restaurant fronted by Marco Pierre White and all. Reports that he went on, whilst audibly scratching his head to state "who the fuck are these bozos anyway?" are, as

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-91484967599121369892010-03-02T17:44:00.003Z2010-03-02T17:49:02.624Z

Because if you can't do it on your own damn blog, where can you? Musn't..gush...or...get...overexcited....Anyhow, for those who are interested, my first poetry collection, L39, is available for sale now here. Not only is it the single most important thing to happen to poetry since the invention of daffodils possessing it will make you smell nicer, grow taller and become better-looking, too.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-28254661663646325872010-02-26T22:55:00.002Z2010-02-26T23:25:15.919Z

Been a while since the super, soaraway Ormskirk Champion has served up such a treat, but this one is wonderful.So anyhow, Marco Pierre White attaches his name to the Swan Inn in Aughton, relaunching it under his aegis. So far so so. Some locals are surprised to learn that he's not cooking there himself, but as they are clearly dolts we shall not allow them to detain us further. Coastalblog is

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-31957220815037096242010-02-24T20:29:00.003Z2010-02-24T20:41:16.922Z

I've had to unban you for this, it's too good.Oh Ashley Ashley, Oh Ashley Ashley Ashley Cole. You genius, you little fucking genius, amidst a world of pygmies you bestride the land like a colossus. Truly we have never seen your like.It started, of course, with your autobiography, and with your hard hitting revelation that tightwad Arsenal wouldn't give you your due, in your own words:When I heard

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-77729214722416011222010-02-22T21:39:00.003Z2010-02-22T21:49:21.578Z

Big review seems like a good idea, then they go and stuff it full of awful charts telling us what some bookshop in fucking brighton or something sells. Or downloads. Or sits in a coffee shop and dreams about whilst they use their twatting iphone to like arrange a meetup yeah at that hot new popup joint which does, like, proper Vietnamese, yeah? I find it hard to care about review sections unless

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-40017602833842082982010-02-15T00:01:00.002Z2010-02-15T00:17:30.603Z

Some notes for your diary, the following words and phrases are banned in my hearing until further notice."In real terms""Contextualised""Knocking it out of the park""That's old-school""That's what I bring to the table/party (delete as applicable)""Punch and Judy politics"Any figure over 100% is banned should it succeed the words "giving it" in a verb clause, all other usages are acceptable. Any

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-56260372195978339842010-02-09T21:56:00.002Z2010-02-09T22:00:44.743Z

Rare work related post plus mutual backscratching corner. Those of you of an alcoholically minded persuasion could do worse than check out the new link in the sidebar to The Ormskirk Baron. Beer tasted and rated, which is sort of part of what I do, and seeing as how he's been good enough to publicise our beer tasting next week it seems only reasonable to reciprocate with linkage, ta Baron!(this

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-54969695900468894982010-02-05T23:40:00.002Z2010-02-05T23:48:23.628Z

I know, describing them specifically as prole wedding pages does make me an awful human being, but honestly, if wishing to exhibit oneself to the magazine hungry baying hordes isn't declasse then what is? This applies to ALL PEOPLE. Not just civilians (to borrow La Hurley's telling nomenclature). Ergo, Kate Middleton, whitebread, Princess Caroline of Monaco, doleite scum, anyone who's ever let us

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-34174607024322613792010-02-05T23:21:00.002Z2010-02-05T23:39:53.076Z

It is to my eternal chagrin that sitemeter lists my location as Widnes. Ever been to Widnes?. Sufice it to say I don't live there, or anywhere near there. In point of fact there are a multitude of major population centres between where I currently sit, and Widnes. It's perplexing.I'll keep it brief, I think, largely because I'm properly goosed and it's a hard old day in the kitchen coming up, but

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-11651316736834517352010-02-01T21:53:00.002Z2010-02-01T22:54:27.124Z

All, of course, should read Gary Younge's article in teh Grauniad today. Better yet, get stuck into the comments for a ripe slice of why people who comment on Grauniad articles are even worse than people who comment on BBC articles. Heaven save us from liberals who want to be iconoclasts. Learn, people, the whole point of being a liberal is to be a big girl's blouse. Try to be a liberal hardass

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-78208212969895998572010-01-21T01:08:00.002Z2010-01-21T01:16:36.694Z

In a slightly bored fit I thought I'd see what single was number one on the day I was born. As it turns out it's something by David Soul. Silver Lady, to be precise. Which only goes to show that the single buying public of 1977 let me down quite badly (though loking through the list, nobody born in 77 got a fair crack of the whip, them's some dismal charts). My son fares marginally better, but

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-60967799219386835332010-01-18T22:05:00.003Z2010-01-18T22:16:12.496Z

It's sad, but it has to be done. The occasional wander through the logs reveals that some people get here by googling the words "sex" and "ormskirk".Well, Ormskirk, clearly, is a proper noun, I live in said proper noun, so it crops up from time to time. "Sex" is a little trickier (fnarr fnarr), when used to determine gender it's a noun, also a verb (as in "to determine the sex of") and

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-30792021693297729242010-01-14T00:46:00.003Z2010-01-14T00:58:09.754Z

really? weirdwhy so lexically concerned all of a sudden? I have my reasons, dammit, of which, more anon, doings may be transpiring, the game's afoot etcThis, again, is more of a placeholder than anything else, frantically busy yet can't bring myself to let ol' creaky Coastalblog (incidentally, there is a blog called Coastal Blog. I believe it to be about coasts) gather dust again. I felt so

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-59205778918900350152009-12-30T22:23:00.002Z2009-12-30T22:27:30.648Z

as you were, hope it was bearableWorth pointing out though that the recent snow made it much easier for me to track Will Smith across town. I just looked for the fresh prints. (Many thanks to a B Morgan of Kernow)See this is a nothing sort of placeholder post, but a few years from now I'll have forgotten that joke, and a random archive delve will turn it up, and huzzahs all around as a result.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-11742065682077652252009-12-18T23:28:00.003Z2009-12-18T23:38:57.928Z

It's brilliant.So your man Tobin is already banged up for two murders. Only one of of which ever gets mentioned, possibly because the other victim was polish and all british news media is inherently racist, I don't know, answers on a postcard. And then the rozzers work out that he gone done another one. The bones in his garden were a giveaway.And now, now he's being linked with up to twelve

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-86428902740498941022009-12-14T22:25:00.003Z2009-12-14T22:38:32.802Z

You just get back into the swing of the whole blogging thing and your compuetr goes and breaks down. A faulty hard drive as it turns out. Just one of life's vicissitudes I guess.So, in the absence of anything germane to add to the sum of human knowledge this week's Melanie Phillips prize for wilful abuse of the english language goes to one other than Alan Shearer for his heroic, Daedalytic

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-42601123988728672192009-11-26T01:18:00.002Z2009-11-26T01:41:19.268Z

Curious, I recently have some visitors googling for John Climo. Who he? You cry. Gather round my children, and I shall tell you a tale.It was early 2006. X-factor still had novelty value and we were still only two eighties revivals into the decade. Truly they were heady times. We got our brains beat out on a weekly basis at the Albert's pub quiz, I was yet to marry, and I didn't yet know every

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-13217279731358803962009-11-23T20:39:00.002Z2009-11-23T20:58:10.266Z

Coastalblog is sad to report that as of this week a number of words have, with great reluctance been made redundant. Times are hard, belt tightening all round, etc, and Im afraid they just aren't cutting it any more. A leaving do will be held at the Queen's Head, Ormskirk on friday, should you wish to pay your respects, or have a whip round and buy the poor, knackered old sods a fucking clock or

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-69631073668174377682009-10-27T20:47:00.001Z2009-10-27T20:48:28.972Z

That is all. This shit should be saved for facebook status updates, I guess.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-54962337678769563842009-10-26T22:44:00.002Z2009-10-26T22:50:54.318Z

like bloody crack, the Daily Mail comments. Anyhoo,one more irresistible one (from a story about people arguing about gays or god or some such thing) and then I'm off to bedDear Ben Summerskill, how awful that you find this old lady's views offensive. By the way, I had to give up walking on some of the best parts of Hampstead Heath because of the toilet waste left by male gays every night, whose

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-104399203756875412009-10-26T21:47:00.002Z2009-10-26T22:22:49.027Z

Typically thoughtful and reasoned piece from the clinically sane Mel Phillips today. Read the headline first. Drink it in. Have you ever, inall your born days, read a collection of words so beautifully tooled to tap into the dark fantasies of the mittelenglische? Let's set aside the obama questioning and palin supporting, mel's really gone for the burn here.Then, o my children, read ye the

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-74860195038174365722009-10-23T23:14:00.002+01:002009-10-23T23:33:06.023+01:00

Not an epic week, the highlight beng moving stuff out of the living room so the plasterer can come in and do his thing. Like the death of a childhood hero there's nothing that reminds you so chillingly that you're full-grown as getting someone in to do something. Brrrr.So a quick post, seeing as I'm back doing this thing again I supose I'd best keep at it, even if there's little of interest to

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-37509373844134355742009-10-16T23:44:00.004+01:002009-10-17T00:15:31.282+01:00

This is, after all, the internet. This particular shitstorm brewed up hours ago, and is already old news, but fuck it, I've been in work all day, I'm feeling slightly misanthropic and here's a chance to thump an old enemy.Doubtless you'e already read Jan Moir's massively upstetting and wrongheaded article. If you've not here you go. Pretty hate filled, huh? The bit about the "happy ever after

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-88017240743268637802009-10-10T22:07:00.002+01:002009-10-10T22:35:55.833+01:00

You remember the ads. Don't make out like you don't. Someone eats a tasty yoghurt (or signs up for a credit card, my memory's somewhat hazy) and someone else sticks their hand in a wood chipper (or is gored by a rhino, again, I forget). Well it's an interesting idea. Well no, it's not, but it's a fragile peg on which to hang a blog post, and I'm bored. So it'll do.So, in the spirit of those

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-10891670964706819082009-10-04T21:06:00.002+01:002009-10-04T21:25:18.056+01:00

As some of you may be aware I spend my days holed up in a kitchen with only a radio for company. As a result I listen to a lot of it. I'd love to listen to radios 4 and 3 but find that I tend to start concentrating on them and not getting any work done. I'd listen to 6 but I can't get it together to go and buy a digital radio, and as any fule kno commercial radio is entirely, entirely beyond the

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-17986843386405290582009-10-03T23:19:00.002+01:002009-10-03T23:30:18.319+01:00

If I have ever known it, it occurred this evening.Mrs Coastalblog is out for a well deserved night out with the girls, leaving me and the boy to our own devices (consisting largely of him shouting "trains daddy" at me and then playing with duplo). We cook dinner. It's very much a joint effort. Ethan likes to stand on a chair by the stove when I cook. This evening, he decides that it's down to him

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-39931061232230237602009-09-22T21:34:00.002+01:002009-09-22T21:41:03.625+01:00

All of those involved with whatever mobile phone company it is that has had that wheeze of special deals "for popular people". And then devised the ad campaign featuring those less popular indulging innocently in whatever hobbies float their respective lardy, unpopular boats should, in all seriousness, kill themselves.I'm not even joking. You people have no idea what misery you've unleashed.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-92106368068279523792009-09-18T23:34:00.002+01:002009-09-18T23:50:02.095+01:00

Y'know, for some obscure reason I thought today would be as good a day as any to post to dear old Coastalblog, languishing in the corner as it has been, treated like a damp uncle on the morn of an otherwise gay shooting party. Poor thing.So as it turns out things continue much as before. Who'd have guessed? Not me. Not for a second. Still overworked and underpaid, though as it's me paying me I

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-77130513859014165202009-03-14T00:15:00.002Z2009-03-14T00:24:11.103Z

Yep, just me here by now I reckon, it really has been a while. Look, I'm really busy, okay? I know, it's a poor excuse, and I promised you that nice dinner and everything, I even said I might get round to putting some new curtains up but you know, it's not happened.I'd love to think that I could pay poor, battered, Doncaster social serviced, Coastalblog the respect and attention it deserves but

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-20353005932935683242008-11-08T01:17:00.002Z2008-11-08T01:24:02.112Z

yes I know, post-tastic; this is what happens when mrs coastalblog goes away for any length of time, frankly it's pathetic. I revert rapidly to the late night wine ways of a few years back in approx ten minutes, this is some lord of the flies shit right here. Yes, I have been listening to a bunch of music that was considered cool ten years ago, why on earth do you ask?Anyhoo, in passing, this

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-75974370564620565752008-11-07T00:56:00.002Z2008-11-07T00:58:41.491Z

You knew this already. I just saw an advert for his new entertaining the troops DVD.He's wearing camo.He's a highly paid comedian who is not,to the best of my knowledge, an actively serving soldier.Ergo, he's a cunt.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-72485263143464279812008-11-04T23:16:00.002Z2008-11-04T23:19:28.839Z

Posted this on I Love Cooking )(on the cheapo recipes thread, hence the various economic recipes thread), but I thought it was high time Coastalblog had an update, poor neglected soul that it is. In work I actually use a mix of venison, partridge, rabbit and mallard for this:Game, god bless it, is pretty cheap (or it is round here, anyway) at the mo. So, diced venison goes in a big dish with

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-44102257852722990192008-09-16T22:06:00.002+01:002008-09-16T22:15:42.074+01:00

Bah. Further perusal of the other Matt Fallaize (or the Continuity Matt Fallaize as I prefer to think of him)'s manifesto reveals him to be (and who would or could have thought otherwise?) a thoroughly reasonable and sensible chap. So more power to his elbow.Anyhoo, on an entirely unrelated matter I note with interest that a couple of Ormskirkian's are keeping up the twon's noble tradition of

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-64299956425635016482008-09-15T23:28:00.002+01:002008-09-15T23:41:55.753+01:00

I've been away from the net too long, clearly. Time was there was only one Matt Fallaize round the top of the google pops. Yours bleedin' truly. But what happens? I bugger off for five minutes to get with the fathering and business starting and all the concomitant fun + games and some other Matt Fallaize goes and sweeps all before him mightily in some election in Guernsey.Now, whilst I must

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-51390553916501750142008-08-07T20:13:00.002+01:002008-08-07T20:24:32.056+01:00

Twice in two days, I do't know what's come over me, I feel all giddy, I'll have to sit down. And whilst I'm sitting down I'll be reading the estimable Gloom Cupboard wherein, further to yesterday's post I'll find one by yours truly. Crikey but we live in a fast moving world these days. I'll have published ten books, gone through three marriages had a public breakdown and be living the life of an

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-57581521400611468202008-08-06T22:02:00.002+01:002008-08-06T22:08:31.586+01:00

Hello chapsWell it's all been beyond hectic, no point reiterating the same old tropes, however life continues. There's a new Ormskirk short story up, should you care to view, the whole getting some poems up on Stride thing made me determined to try to keep going, one way or the other, I'm off to submit a few elsewhere whilst I'm at this so toodle pip. Watch this space though, I think I may

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-68543679720657163092008-06-03T13:43:00.002+01:002008-06-03T13:46:54.144+01:00

Just.Poems up at Stride here. Hmm, took a while to rememebr the html there, clearly not enough time spent at the computer these days. Anyhow, proof (if proof be need be) that some creative work is still ongoing. Though not much. Maybe even some new OSS before too much longer.This is, of course, all time dependant, and as I may have noted, i have bugger all. But we shall see.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-4371708758617964052008-04-16T21:34:00.003+01:002008-04-16T21:46:14.556+01:00

So I managed to take a couple of days off to swing by the south east and give poor old grandparents (who for various reasons have been unable to thus far) a taste of The Boy. Jolly pleasant it was too, he sat and cooed and gurgled obligingly thus cheering grandparents up no end. Familial duties discharged it was warm glows all round.However, with no disrespect intended to the relloes (who it was,

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-35800588755543942252008-04-07T22:00:00.002+01:002008-04-07T22:45:26.464+01:00

I've been thinking a lot about ownership recently.I work in two spheres where originality is a nebulous concept. In writing we talk of all influences having a direct bearing on one's personal style, an unconscious script. If you've read Creeley then some Creeley ineivitably creeps in; if you've read Berrigan then some wanders up without you realising; if you've read Andrew Motion then you'll make

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-16578593580745688822008-03-30T17:21:00.002+01:002008-03-30T17:33:12.744+01:00

Here at Coastal Towers it is rapidly approaching what everyones favourite beetroot-fizogged professional Scot Sir Alex Ferguson once memorably described as squeaky bum time (though I suspect he may have nicked the line off everyones favourite wheely-bin Ashley Giles). Yes, the coffers are empty, the credit card's maxed out and it's time to see if the business can actually stand me taking a wage

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-14169063914537717322008-02-27T21:40:00.002Z2008-02-27T21:55:48.780Z

Look, I'm aware that I'm talking to myself here. Two months is an unconscionably long time in Internetland, where the hours waiting for the next reply to your witty comment on someone elses blog attenuate beyond the capability of mere temporal nomenclature to contain them. Here in the actual living, breathing, husbanding, fathering, cooking world, however, it shoots by like a very fast thing.

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-26377011639222784482007-12-27T22:44:00.000Z2007-12-27T22:54:51.873Z

The assassination of Benazir Bhutto is, of course one of those oh, bugger, moments when you can see all manner of shit hitting a cornucopia of fans.All politicking aside, it behooves us to recall that someone has been murdered. Any response other than feeling appalled is inappropriate in the extreme.So a silver medal of twatdom for Miliband's shrugging "well, she knew the risks", but the gold, as

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-62217808115255248392007-12-21T21:29:00.000Z2007-12-21T21:41:12.465Z

Look, I'm not going into it. The paint, the constant sore throat, the hammers and walls and tiles oh my.But we managed to open.So your humble correspondent has been an upstanding pillar of the community, one of Bonaparte's famed nation of shopkeepers for a whole three weeks though, most of which has been spent in a state of blind panic staring at the door and willing it to open. Things seem to be

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-34659272116043264592007-11-15T20:46:00.000Z2007-11-15T20:48:39.176Z

Post about end of an earhole and leaving my stove will follow shortly.In the meantime, remember how I bang on about the frankly terrifying nature of the BBC's Have your Say feature? These collate it far better than I ever could

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-35322895479710885302007-11-07T15:30:00.000Z2007-11-07T15:33:30.847Z

Shop-fitting continues apace, and I spend my days coated in a faint sheen of plasterboard. There's been all sorts of posts I wanted to write but, frankly, I barely have the energy to play facebook scrabble. I get home with enough time to shower and then head out for an evening shift in the kitchen.All worth it in the long run then, but you don't want to read a lengthy missive about how knackered

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-90116412971344565502007-10-22T15:02:00.000+01:002007-10-22T15:09:05.107+01:00

The ominous disappearance of the shopfitter guy boded correctly. Despite telling us that he's go in the day we signed the lease he NOW says he can't go in for four (count 'em) weeks. Now this is bad news for a variety of reasons. We didn't want to be opening this late in the year as it was, but consoled ourselves that we'd at least have a little bit of bedding in time before Christmas. It's still

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-68508202195128525742007-10-21T20:37:00.001+01:002007-10-21T20:50:25.279+01:00

Hoo-fucking-ray.Sixteen months ago a friend and I were playing squash, as the game wore on we were gassing more than playing, and bitching about our jobs. Wouldn't it be nice, we thought, to work for ourselves.So we went and did something about it. Tomorrow we sign the lease and then, fingers crossed, tge shopfitters can get to work and so, hopefully, with good luck and a following wind, our deli

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-30996219333376844312007-10-15T07:45:00.000+01:002007-10-15T07:54:28.565+01:00

After some sad news, some good.Quieter than usual round these parts recently. This is not for lack of things to mention, I fully intended pouring scorn on York council's foie gras ban, telling you breathlessly of my actual encounter with an honest to goodness member of the Ormskirk and West Lancs Model Boating society (The president no less), extolling the soaring success of the mighty Fort,

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-80452040277543918222007-09-27T17:33:00.000+01:002007-09-27T17:42:31.337+01:00

it is with a great degree of sadness that I recently got news of the death of poet, academic and all round good egg Bill Griffiths. A long time hero of mine (a link to his website, now broken, has been in the sidebar since day one) it was reading his vital, playful and above all engaging poems which first nudged me off the somewhat formulaic path I'd been treading into the more fruitful areas

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-19455405713220711732007-09-17T12:15:00.000+01:002007-09-17T12:26:40.200+01:00

I was vaguely amused last night by a slew of facebook status updates featuring people moaning about monday being imminent. I couldn't concur, for the last few weeks it's been my only day off. Sometimes not even then (witness intemperate outburst of rage at bank hoidays not so long ago). I'm inclined to like them as a result. Should you work in the catering industry and you're lucky enough to get

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-91294592516077071642007-09-12T08:30:00.000+01:002007-09-12T08:43:53.557+01:00

That's BBC Entertainment reporter Mark Savage.Now, this being the intenet and all, you're doubtless well aware of Ms Britney Spears distressing appearance at some telly do or other.(I'll have to pause here in wonderment that I'm actually writing a blog post [in part] about Britney Spears).You've all seen it, it was unedifying, the girl was blitzed out of her skull. Now, whether or not she's

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-69184608400623203282007-09-11T08:31:00.000+01:002007-09-11T08:49:03.313+01:00

Bill Bailey has this entertaining song written from the perspective of a teenager with excellent parents who "pickme up from school / you attended all my sporting functions", the payoff of course being his rage at the very fact of their good parenting "How can I feel pain / when you're being so supportive?". It is a fact that teenagers are feeble-minded (sorry chaps, but it just goes with the

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5874502.post-43612229646349587642007-09-03T13:55:00.000+01:002007-09-03T14:31:49.139+01:00

I've been lounging it up in a hotel in darkest Bucks, celebrating my grandparents frankly astonishing feat of reaching a fiftieth wedding anniversary. All well and good, nice to see family, even nicer to have a weekend away with Mrs Coastaltown. Less nice to pay southern hotel drinks prices (A tenner for two drinks? Thank christ I'm back in the north) but the hotel was paid for us so win some,

Matthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06413625888201399595noreply@blogger.com