Coastalblog is sad to report that as of this week a number of words have, with great reluctance been made redundant. Times are hard, belt tightening all round, etc, and Im afraid they just aren't cutting it any more. A leaving do will be held at the Queen's Head, Ormskirk on friday, should you wish to pay your respects, or have a whip round and buy the poor, knackered old sods a fucking clock or some such thing.
Amazing having done sterling work for a number of years as the go-to adjective of choice for lazy DJ's wishing to describe anything from a muffin they just ate to the size of their morning shit has, I'm afraid, held up its hands and admitted defeat. Said Amazing, yesterday "The last straw was the MSN website using me to decribe John and Edward Grime's short-lived reality TV career. I used to be used to evoke a sense of wonder, awe at the beauty and intricacy of life. Now I'm attached to a pair of mini Max Headrooms for no reason other than no fucker's bought a thesaurus in the last hundred years. I don't have to put up with this, I was used about Everest. Don't even start me on Greg fucking James".
Journey also suffered the fall-out from this sordid affair, having often been set in harness with Amazing to describe tiny squibs of nothing which were anything but (see: "Calum Best's amazing journey", also "Leslie Ash's amazing journey" Not sure why, they were merely the first two that popped into my head). Journey will continue its part-time job as a proper noun attached to some piece of shit American band that British stoners who watch too much family guy will profess to love simply because, in their scarred heart of heats, they wish they were that kid from the Wonder Years (younger readers, ask your dad).
Unprecedented in the wake of the recent floods, hasn't been retired, merely redefined as "an occurence for which there is plenty of precedent, but I'm too fucking thick to think of another adjective" hello the news!
Amazing having done sterling work for a number of years as the go-to adjective of choice for lazy DJ's wishing to describe anything from a muffin they just ate to the size of their morning shit has, I'm afraid, held up its hands and admitted defeat. Said Amazing, yesterday "The last straw was the MSN website using me to decribe John and Edward Grime's short-lived reality TV career. I used to be used to evoke a sense of wonder, awe at the beauty and intricacy of life. Now I'm attached to a pair of mini Max Headrooms for no reason other than no fucker's bought a thesaurus in the last hundred years. I don't have to put up with this, I was used about Everest. Don't even start me on Greg fucking James".
Journey also suffered the fall-out from this sordid affair, having often been set in harness with Amazing to describe tiny squibs of nothing which were anything but (see: "Calum Best's amazing journey", also "Leslie Ash's amazing journey" Not sure why, they were merely the first two that popped into my head). Journey will continue its part-time job as a proper noun attached to some piece of shit American band that British stoners who watch too much family guy will profess to love simply because, in their scarred heart of heats, they wish they were that kid from the Wonder Years (younger readers, ask your dad).
Unprecedented in the wake of the recent floods, hasn't been retired, merely redefined as "an occurence for which there is plenty of precedent, but I'm too fucking thick to think of another adjective" hello the news!
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