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Brexit, football, myth and legend

Much gentle amusement was to be derived today from the more Brexity arms of our illustrious press, as they reacted with horror to Michel Barnier suggesting that it's a chance to explain the benefits of the single market. Who does he think he is? thundered the Mail, the Sun and the Telegraph were equally unhappy, much chuntering along the lines how this PROVES leaving the EU is the right thing to do etc. I expect the Express was upset too but seriously, who reads the Express?

Naturally, because it never does to let actual quotes get in the way of a good bit of xenophobia, they chose to interpret his remarks as "Teaching the UK a lesson". Which is, of course, an outrage, because what could we possibly learn from foreigners? As any fule kno, Blighty is the pre-eminent global power, and lesser nations should be grateful that we deign to let them speak our mother tongue and sample our innovative jams. The very idea that we might actually learn someting by listening to people is an affront to the British way of life, that's not the sort of thinking that won us an Empire, is it?

There are parallels here with the somewhat lumpen disappointment of England football fans, walking out some way before the finish as the national side struggled to put away lowly Malta. Rather than applaud a doughty maltese defensive effort, or reccall that even the massively more succesful Italy only came away 1-0 recently, they decided to boo their own side, then walk out. We should have been 6 up, it's our right as England, giants of the game. All nations fear our mighty footballing juggernaut. It's our destiny to win every world cup, ever.

This sense of entitlement, of certainty that to be an englishman is to have won in the lottery of life, is one of our less endearing national characteristics (and the reason that quite a large swathe of the world, including the rest of the UK, quite reasonably hates our guts). But it used to be a source of strength. It's okay, we'll pull through. Increasingly though, it seems bewilderingly blinkered. Brexiteers and england football fans are of a piece, entirely unable to see the world as it is. Michel Barnier does. Gareth Southgate does. Barnier gently points out that sitting there with your fingers in your ears assuming everything will be fine doesn't really constitute a negotiating strategy. David Davis responded by calling him "silly". Southgate gently points out that we haven't won a bloody thing for fifty years and it's a young team, so maybe temper expectation. Both are pilloried, because the self-mythologising has already run out of control. It happened a long time ago, and what we're seeing now is simply the natural end product. It is to be hoped that Southgate takes his chance and proves the doubters wiong, but unfortunately there's a certain type of football fan who will foam at the mouth regardless. It is furthermore to be hoped that some grown-ups get involved in the Brexit negotiations, but likewise, there's a certain type of Brexiteer wh will foam at the mouth regardless. Look at Frarage, cynically suggesting that we do deals now, which we can't, as he knows. For these morons, anything less than leaving the EU, closing our borders at once, not paying a penny and yet somehow still having magically tariff free trade will be a "betrayal of the British people." the British people, of course, were betrayed the second these clowns started lying to us.

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