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Things I have learned in the last couple of months.

Well, it's been an interesting couple of months since I made the momentous decision to jack my job in. I got a few odd looks at the time but on balance I think it was the right thing to do. The only problem is the ruinous damage it's done to my bank balance

It's just been so wonderful to have the time to sit down and think about things that a few months ago I was too flat out to bother about, i.e. my future, what I want to do with it and so forth. it's been just as wonderful to get some writing done and to reconnect with the creative side of myself. Lo and behold once I started writing again my mood lifted immeasurably (I wouldn't bandy loaded words like depression about, but I was certainly getting in some foul tempers). The most wonderful thing of all has been falling in love with my girlfriend all over again. Not that I was ever out of love with her, but before I was tired, or she was tired, and on the rare days off we shared the pressure would always be to do something with it, to make an effort, rather than just relax and enjoy each other's company. I'd finish a shift and have to get drunk or stoned to unwind, this in turn would wind her up, making me feel guilty and then angry at her for making me feel guilty, and so it goes on. None of that bollocks any more, we understand each other a lot better.

So, what else have I learned since the start of October? Well, my patchwork career has taken an interesting new direction. As of january you'll be able to add part-time lecturing to my increasingly entertaining list of jobs, I'm looking forward to that immensely, not least because (as I alluded to in an earlier post) looking through the basics of writing poetry, learning it all over again with the students will be an invaluable opportunity for me to evaluate what I do with my own writing, to trace its development and gain a better understanding of my own poetics. This can only serve to make me a better writer. I've expanded my repertoire of recipes by some degree, I've learned how easy it is to keep on top of housework when you've got on top of it, I've rediscovered my love of walking, the outdoors and wildlife. I've also done what I always promised myself I would and learned how to do cryptic crosswords. My glee at solving more than a couple of clues is unconfined.

I've missed the cut and thrust of catering a lot more than I expected to, but I don't miss my last job at all. It was killing me. I think that I'll almost certainly go back into catering, but armed with what I've learned over the last couple of months about balancing work and life I'll do it on a much surer footing.

Set against all that losing a few grand doesn't seem so important, does it?

And now december is almost upon us, and I'll be working pretty solidly all month (it's been personally gratifying how many people have wanted to take me on), but with less responsibility comes less stress, and I'm looking forward to getting back to the pit-head. So here we jolly well go again, best foot forward and all that.

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