Coastalblog

Ten things 1) Long poem sequences (for list of rules see 2) my new blog ) 3) Off to Liverpool Saturday for Jim's birthday, beer and SUSHI = what's not to like? 4) Elastica's version of Trio's Da Da Da 5) Amiri Baraka 6) Two hundred pounds worth of tax rebate OH YES 7) It's nearly spring so therefore justifying 8) Guilt-free crushes 9) Avocado salsa with lemon and chilli 10) Really fucking big cigars POSSIBLY ALL AT THE SAME TIME

Who needs kids? Coastalblog would like to take this opportunity to salute the latest(temporary) addition to our household; brought home for the hols by Roe, Herbert the Hamster, a diminutive creature who spends all day asleep. Naturally indigent occasional lodger, Treacle the Cat, is intrigued, but is not currently being allowe in, leading to plenty of hurt posturing on windowsills. In non Hamster related news Jim is back in the hunt for the great Fort William goals conceded spread, as despite a gallant battle Fort succumbed to Fraserburgh yesterday by the mere matter of seven goals to two. Poor show. I myself am considering withdrawing, ooh, about fifty quid, and heading north to "Do an Abramovich"

No fixture for the Fort this weekend, though intrepid digging does yield this frankly sordid tale . My hat would be off were it not that I don't wear hats. No presence of mine at last week's cut-throat derby in the Albert's quiz, so it would be unseemly to write a report up under the circs, suffice it to say the phrase "garden variety" would have appeared. Normal service to be resumed shortly. Otherwise? Otherwise it's all pretty good. Lecturing is very much fun, stroppy teenagers aside (my third years are lovely, on account of having had a crucial couple of years growing up behind them, the first years are mostly pleasant enough but...fech, well, I remember what an annoying bastard I was at that age). I'm learning a lot, and learning it fast. Rather exhilerating, actually. And, to conclude, enjoy Valentine's Day. I shall be celebrating it in the usual manner, by going to work and ignoring it entirely(though I am sorely tempted by the 8p Asda Cards, ma

Now, we are a varied bunch of supporters here at Coastal Towers. I myself am Spurs born and bred, when Liverpool are winning Jim pretends to take an interest (that's not strictly fair, it just seems that whenever they register a loss I can't seem to find him for a couple of days) and Roe remains stoutly, if misguidedly, loyal to Grimsby Town. However there's one team which captured our hearts earlier this season, and to whom my loyalties, if I only I could, would switch. Step forward FOrt William FC . Now, the Scottish league is routinely derided here in England. I recall Gretna Green, when they played in the Unibond, getting absolutely twatted by Burscough, a village marginally smaller than my living room. Gretna switched leagues and are currently top of the Scottish division two, Burscough are two whole divisions away from playing league football. So it follows that the Highland league, scottish non-league, is perhaps not of the most forbidding standard. Unless you're

GUILTY AS HELL: Scenes of delirium in court this week as "cold blooded killer" John Climo was "sent down" for LIFE for the murder of Ormskirk businessman Kenneth Iddon. Gosh. The judge was left in "no doubt" that he'd been paid to do it. Though who actually did that seems largely to be being glossed over at the moment. Regular coastalblog readers won't recall (as I didn't bother mentioning it) that the original trial of his wife and her son collapsed when they entered a plea of "who, us?" and the jury returned a verdict of "fair enough." TURTLES WIN AGAIN, TEAM JESUS "WORSE THAN TROTSKY": A gallant, battling performance from the perennial All Westhead All the Time League chancers saw them scrape a creditable third in last weeks Winner-takes-some clash at the Albert. Transfer rumours abound after midfield dynamo Lesley "Lesley" Kenny pointed mysteriously at a comfy chair and said "comfy chair, that&

It appears that I have been tagged with the Four Things meme (it always takes me a while to realise these things). So here we go: Four jobs I've had: God, do I have to stop at four? Okay: lecturer, roofer, restaurant manager, maker of garden ornaments Four movies I can watch over and over: Network, the Princess Bride, Kind Hearts and Coronets, Dinner Rush Four places I have lived: Cheshunt, Herts; Ware, Herts; Boscastle, Cornwall; Ormskirk, Lancashire Four TV shows I like to watch: I don't watch a great deal of telly but the Simpsons, Neighbours, University Challenge, Newsnight Four foods that I like: Moules a la Portugaise, Apple and Blackberry crumble, confited duck with chorizo and red cabbage, wholemeal bread with strong cheddar and an apple Four websites I visit daily: Resonance FM , ILX , BBC News , Cricinfo Four things I want to do before I die: Publish a book, invent a time machine, cart Shane Warne for a straight six into the Compton stand at Lords, Victoria Coren Four