Skip to main content

From there to here

Forgive me. I've suffered a moment of introspection (I nearly typed "I have" rather than the less demagogic "I've", for some reason). It doesn't happen overly often, as a general rule of thumb I'm a firm believer in the whole pioneer school of thought, y'know, get your head down, get over it, keep going. That whole irritating Boy Scout thing (not that I was ever a fan of Scouts, the moment I discovered that we didn't get to bake and the Guides did I was out of there). I just tend to have found that it doesn't do to dwell.

Put it down to getting married, maybe. It's a seismic change in one's personal condition, the certain knowledge that well, this is it. You stand or fall on your own merits from here on out, fucko, you've made a promise. And it is a promise, not to be lightly fucked about with. But it was a wedding present which caused the moment.

You see, my dad was a professional photographer (my brother still is). Now here is not the place to go on about why these chaps are as good as they are, suffice it to say that some people are photographers and others aren't. My Dad and my brother are as eloquent with a photograph as you or I might be with a song, a story, a recipe, whatever, it's their sphere of ability. Part of Dad's present was a composite photo he'd skilfully made (and the touching part is that I know that this was digging out negatives and proper darkroom stuff, he regards digital photography in much the same way that any baker worth his salt regards self-raising flour) of me in various stages of childhood.

Now, I was a cute baby, there're no two ways about it, apparently. A toothy-grinned blond muppet, generally to be found in an obliging pose. As the years wore on,the poses became less obliging; there is possibly a tedious growth metaphor to be derived here. The baby photos are nice, and lead to many jokes of the "so what went wrong?" variety. The portion of the photo I found interesting was the thirteen year old me. At an age where the fully formed adult is supposed to be emerging it looks absolutely nothing like me. A widely smiling, slightly geeky (and how I wish I had fully embraced the now clearly incipient geekdom rather than running from it, I may have ended up dating Willow. Do Not Watch Television, is the lesson here, I think) and entirely unsurly (in fact, entirely devoid of surl, whatever that is) teenager looks out. I looked at the photo properly for the first time tonight, and in it's glass fronted reflection caught an image of the way I am today, altogether different. Don't get me wrong, I'm a happy man, I love my wife, I'm happy with myself, but it was a shock to see so abruptly how the years wear themselves on a face, the roundness of youth worn off, the edges showing, cheekbones, jaw. I had an overriding urge to go back and tell the boy with the guileless smile that I know you wouldn't believe it to look at me now but hey, it all works out for the best. I thought about all that had happened between him and me and wanted to go back and fight for him, stand by him though those times where I know he would feel like nobody was(even though they were), wanted to war him off the mistakes, point out what good old hindsight knew best.

But of course, that would be idiotic. Poor old him, good job he had a happy endng, eh?

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Creepy old men

I note, somewhat wearily, that creepy old men are back in the news, being creepy. Creepy old men, and their apologists and enablers, who argue that their creepiness is somehow the natural order of things. Old men would have you believe that it is difficult to not be a creepy old man. That it is a task of epic proportions. It is not that difficult. It is a matter of intention. As yet more of the grimness of Epstein unfolds, creepy old men are, sadly, a flaccid topic once again. Whether it be pursuing students thirty years their junior, or simply not asking too many questions about the background of the probably legal young woman who you've just been introduced to by your good pal Jeff. To be clear, I am not referring to criminal creepy old men, the ones who actually committed statutory rape, the ones who fucked trafficked hirls. That is not something which is allowed to get away merely with the contempt of the observer.  That deserves prison.  No , I'm referring to the hinterla...

Inedible

"He says it's inedible" said my front of house manager, as she laid the half-eaten fish and chips in front of me, and instantly I relaxed.  Clearly, I observed, it was edible to some degree. I comped it, because I can't be arsed arguing the toss, and I want to make my front of house's lives as simple as possible. The haddock had been delivered that morning. The fryers had been cleaned that morning. The batter had been made that morning (and it's very good batter, ask me nicely and I'll give you the recipe some time). The fish and chips was identical to the other 27 portions I'd sent out on that lunch service, all of which had come back more or less hoovered up, we have have a (justified, if I do say so myself) very good reputation for our chips. But it was, apparently, "inedible". When it comes to complaints, less is more. If you use a hyperbolic word like that, I'll switch off, you've marked yourself as a rube, a chump, I'm not g...

The five best things I ate in Newcastle

 I have had a brief holiday.  This isn't an entirely remarkable turn of events, it happens from time to time. Not as often as the happy, gilded folk who occupy my Insta feed, it would appear, or the University acquaintances whose lives would seem to be one long roundelay of chic European mini-breaks but, nevertheless, holidays occur though, perhaps not quite with the frequency with which, in an ideal world, I would wish In this instance, in an even rarer turn of events  we were sans offspring. Oh yes. Sorry lads. Thus is because Mrs Coastalblog and I went away to celebrate our twentieth wedding anniversary (Miracles, etc, less for murder, etc, if you could just dump all the jokes within these parentheses and then we could all get on with our lives) and because we're the sort of perverts that like going to places by train, and going to places we're not overly familiar with, we wound up in Newcastle. A fine, handsome city with much to recommend it, but what I wish to consid...