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Hats

So I've been watching coverage of the heavily sponsored festival season, and it has thrown up several questions, chief amongst which being what on earth is Lauren Laverne still doing with the rest of the painfully idiotic T4 massive (wage notwithstanding)? But what use are questions without answers, or more pertinently, conclusions? And yes, some conclusions were drawn, none of which are earth shattering in their insight, or in any way imbued with the shock of the new, but what are you gonna do? I'm talking about festival television, it's easy targets all the way, baby.

Paul Weller is a nitwit, but we knew this. The current crop of indie rock bands are entirely indistinguishable, but Kasabian are PARTICULARLY indistinguishable, you know what I mean. Morrissey, annoyingly( not to be anti Stephen, but more surely SOMEONE has come along since him with at least half a wit?), is still a far more engaging interviewee than, well, anybody in this particular sphere, specifically Paul Weller (I may have mentioned him already, but the man really is a dullard). The ball achingly overaching conclusion drawn though was this, and only this.

Hats.

Men. Do not wear hats.

Do not wear hats unless you are sharply dressed and the hat in question is a fedora, or if it's hot and you have a linen suit / Panama thing going on. Do not wear those safari style affairs first popularised by Reni from the Stone the Roses TWENTY YEARS AGO. Girls can look cute in these hats, particularly if there are pigtails poking out from beneath them, they can look engagingly out from beneath the brim, they can carry them off because, well, they're girls, girls can do that sort of thing. Men cannot carry them off, men look like goons, and bellowing the chorus to "A town called Malice" whilst hugging your mates does NOTHING to dispel this.

Men. Do not wear hats. You know the ones I mean. Just stop it.

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