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Ladies and gentlemen we are drowning in booze

Now, I'm as fond of a drink as the next man, unless the next man happens to be (insert recent drunk celebrity here for instant smug yucks) but I'm starting to get a little uneasy about the up and up of the booze-tastic trade in dear ol' ormy of late.

Please do not misunderstand me, part of my living comes from the sale of alcohol, though I very much doubt that any criticism of the binge-drinking britain sort could be directed at my eminent and tasteful customers, what with the average purchase being a couple of bottles of beer, meant for the savouring, rather than necking. Plus, if you want to try and get drunk on our stuff then you're probably coping better with these recession-hit times than most. This is in no sense a complaint by somone witha slice of the pie wanting to stop others geting stuck in, I'm talking about a different market altogether.

Now, should one wish to get out of one's head in the skirk, there are currently about thirty options within fifteen minutes walk of my front door. Most of them, admittedly, are fucking awful but should I require an actual decent honest to goodness pint, or even god help me go out for a glass of wine I do have options.

This is no bad thing, in point of fact it's heartening to see some of the older boozers come roaring back to life, particularly the one where I cut my teeth as a callow eighteen year old (cough cough) years ago, admittedly most of them are now tipped so heavily towards those crazy kids that even at the right side of thrirty five (though wrong of thirty) I have zero inclination to go into them. But I'd rather they were open than not. Another opened just before christmas. It's alright, as it happens, better than most, but the number clicks upwards.

But hark, what's this? A wetherspoons opening? O-kay. Now, not in and of itself such a bad thing, my indie instincts aren't happy at the prospect of a chain but you're guaranteed a decent beer. But still, another pub. And then, what further news? A group of shops sold to make room for a wine bar (allegedly at time of press, incidentally). Several diverse shops, at least one with a unique service (ormskirkians'll know where I mean, suffice to say Cel and Jim, your fridays would have been ruined) all gone, and in their place, another boozer (allegedly). Um, dear fellow citzens, might it not be an idea if we all calmed down for a second? All I'm saying is, thirty-odd boozers, one book-shop. Doesn't reflect overly well on us, does it? Maybe have a nice cup of tea instead?

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